Brain in Overdrive

So recently I started writing again and I'm having trouble shutting my brain off. I remember having this problem before. I worked really hard to shut it off the last time, but it meant I had to stop writing. So that brings me to my question of the day.

How do you balance doing something practical with doing what you love, especially when what you love tends to consume you?

I love to write, I've fought it many times but I really do love to write. Its one of the best creative outlets for me. I've tried other options: singing, dancing, acting and painting. Writing has been the best for me and no where near the catastrophe that painting was. I've been blessed with a very active imagination capable of playing stories through my head like movies as I write them. Unfortunately its a little over active. When I'm really in the zone, it sometimes takes days for my brain to calm down. I'll lay in bed wide awake unable to slow down enough to fall asleep. Eventually I get it to slow down a bit but its not easy.

I'm currently in school getting my masters in kinesiology. Which seems very silly and completely different from my true passion. If things keep progressing the way they are, I'll probably end up in a Doctorate of Physical Therapy program and spend the rest of my life working with athletes. Not exactly the ideal life for a writer, right?

So that leaves me with my dilemma. If I want to write really really good stuff, I need to focus completely on my writing. If I try to half focus on it, I write crap, complete and utter crap. If I focus on the practical path, there's no writing because I'll need all my brain power to get me through school.

Its hard to imagine sometimes but, I know I would be completely ecstatic spending the rest of my life with a pen, paper and a laptop. But that means I'd have to take a chance on the impractical path. As a physical therapist I'd be financially stable and be in a stable job market. If only someone would come along and hit me over the head with a paper containing an ad for a good paying writing gig. I think I'd write anything, I love sports, travel, theatre, arts and movies, there has to be something out there in one of those areas, right? Unfortunately no one is holding that magical paper.

So where am I now, after this somewhat long winded rant? Starring at page 4 of my current writing project. I'm starring because my brain is having an argument over whether or not to continue. I think my love for writing and my doing the practical thing dilemma is what's keeping me from getting completely into my writing. My mind is there, well half of it, furiously plotting and planning what comes next. But the other half is pissed because I left my anatomy book in Harrisburg and I could be doing some studying for Anatomy next semester. My heart is desperately leaning towards the writing project, but its too much in love with the brain to disobey either half. I had hoped to be less conflicted by the end of this post. But I find I'm not. Well I am a little, but I wouldn't admit that.

All dreams are obtainable if you believe.

I believe, I really believe...why do my dreams seem to be just out of my reach?